"I'm bored. I'm the chairman of the bored."
For the most part, 2007 was the classic example of a bad year. A lot of bad shit went down and I didn't respond and react to it very well. In fact, I spent most of the year with my head shoved up my ass simply because I wasn't responding and reacting like I should. It felt like I was constantly fighting against the current and I burned myself out from simultaneously fighting the world and fighting myself. Sure, there were some shining moments, but by and large, the bad shit stifled the good.
So far, 2008 hasn't been much better. Where 2007 was a constant barrage of shit ripping my nerves to shreds, this year has been more about boredom. I'm learning that boredom is equally as destructive, but it's a very, very slow process like being stabbed with tiny knives and bleeding to death through a pinhole.
I get up in the morning and just thinking about the day laid out before me is enough to make me want to shove my head in the sand. The problem with that is that it's not a realistic option, because there's no sand and besides, it leaves your ass wide open (so to speak) for vandalism or worse. Since I fear the "or worse", I force myself into motion and thus, the routine begins...again.
After getting all cleaned and duded up for the workplace, I make my way to the vehicle, which in recent days and weeks has involved snow and/or ice removal accompanied with freezing the non-vandalized (or worse) ass off. As I've said before, the Kentucky version of winter most likely pales in comparison to what a lot of you deal with and I'm not trying to make it into a pissing contest. We did have several fairly mild weeks, but about the time we crossed the threshold into February, things got really shitty.
The days were gray, the days were cold and we had what seemed like a constant supply of wintry precipitation dropping from the sky. It got to the point where I actually tried to devise a way to set the sky on fire and like most everything else, I failed miserably with the project. The sky remained gray and continued to dump shit on the Bluegrass State like there was no tomorrow. Tomorrow would ultimately be just like yesterday and yesterday sucked.
Between a birthday, Valentine's Day, the excruciating boredom, and suck ass weather, February has beaten down my morale like Ike beat Tina. I don't care about this, I don't care about that, I don't want to be here, I don't want to be there, this sucks, that sucks, and it's like swimming in a sea of indifference. Go to work and go on mental autopilot until I can go home. Go home to eat dinner (typically in the 8:00 - 9:00 pm time frame), try to find something somewhat entertaining to watch on television to act as a distraction until it's time to attempt to coax the mind to shut down for something vaguely resembling sleep.
The pre-struggle-to-sleep television time period is a reminder to me that we live in a society in serious decline. The television industry is equally as pathetic as the music industry as far churning out anything with substance and creativity. I feel like I've located a goldmine if I am fortunate enough to locate a rerun of M*A*S*H on TV Land and those episodes are practically etched into my brain. With few exceptions, music has me digging through past favorites which is good but sometimes, you want to find something new to challenge the brain and turn you on. As far as books, I've skimmed a few of my obligatory music biographies and even as far as trying to get interested in the Dostoevsky book that I bought months ago for a challenge. So far, it seems about as exciting as a seminar on drying paint. Hell's bells, even the Internet has become the same old song and dance.
It's times like these where I really wish I was a consumer of adult beverages or had a nagging drug habit to make things more interesting, but I'm thinking even those things would be lackluster.
So let's have the Descendents take us home with their 1996 classic, Everything Sux. Hit it, maestro...
Got up this morning to make some coffee
Everything sucks today
Prayed someone hired a hitman to off me
Everything sucks today
Got up on the wrong side of life this morning
Nothing today is gonna go my way
Horoscope told me lies this morning
I don't think anything is gonna be okay
Today
Everything sucks today
Everything sucks today
Everything sucks today
Right girl didn't call and the wrong one's knockin'
Everything sucks today
Flat tire on my car so I guess I'm walkin'
Everything sucks today
Taxman came and took my money
Now all my other bills are gonna be late
My girlfriend's movin' in this morning
I don't think anything is gonna be okay
Today
Everything sucks today
Everything sucks today
Everything sucks today
Got up on the wrong side of life this morning
Nothing today is gonna go my way
Horoscope told me lies this morning
I don't think anything is gonna be okay
Today
Everything sucks today
Everything sucks today
Everything sucks today
